Friday, 25 November 2011

Emigrating is hard work. Who'd've thunk it.

Who would’ve thought that running away with your eyes closed would be so taxing.

In my head: I throw a few key items into my Longchamps weekender, weep a silent tear and shuffle off in a black cab, Berlin-bound to start my new life.

Real thing: Stressy Armpits, chewed off nails and living out of giant friggen laundry bags.

There’s cancelling of water, lines, contracts, accounts bla bla bleurgh I know the waiting line tracks to O2 by heart now and don’t even get me started on EXCESS BAGGAGE!!!

The man (who came with the van) communicated in grunts and f*s (really? 1million sperm and you were the fastest?!), so I will be amazed if he turns up tomorrow, let alone gets me to my destination in one piece.

There should be a service where you pay a one off fee and they sort your shit out for you. There. Now someone go patent that and make a buck.(and then call me please?)

#NowListeningTo Devo – Big Mess

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